Monday, January 9, 2012

Here in what is again, sunny Florida, I find myself transforming from my previous self and confronting issues from my past quite successfully. Having been so separate from this family of people has been hard because I never really knew the truth. The truth will set you free. How many times have you heard that in your lifetime? I see now, in hindsight, as usual, the affect these truths held me back from. I have to say it was my coping mechanism, to not know the truth. Now having been confronted by it; I am free. My mind is more open than anytime in the last decade and I see myself for the person I had hoped others would have seen me. It's true. They knew the goodness in me, and I am so relieved to find that out now.
One should never leave the past unexposed. Take control by seeing what it is for real. I don't have what it takes to battle my blood family over the past right now, but this family is good for me. I wish I had recorded all the conversations I have had about my past to compile them together in a book that would be of help to others. I am working at it and trying to present it in it's true light; but the darkness of it is so evil and frightening I can only do it in short periods of time. Recovery from the memory of those times takes more time than actually confronting the issue, but it is worth it and I feel safe here doing just that.

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