IT WAS JUST A SIMPLE WALK!

Image by Farruska via FlickrIn a conversation today, with a friend, I remembered that I have always said, when people are “thinking or feeling” that others dislike them, or are talking about them or they believe they do not like them, this is what I think “unless you tell me that you do not like me, I will assume that you do.” I have always played that in my mind. I developed it a long time ago when I was trying to find “self-confidence” in myself. I find it funny now that I was actually looking for confidence in myself. If I was believing or thinking that others did not like me or were talking about me, then I was lost in “ego”. Most grow up believing that “ego” is a good thing about a person. Most have always believed that when a person has a good “ego” they have a good sense of themselves, they are confident, but, how do you have a good “ego” when the “ego” is what separates you from God. The “ego” is where you go when you are not “within“.

Being “within” is peace. I have been recovering from Agoraphobia which manifested as panic attacks. Funny, because Agoraphobia is a state of fear, as is anxiety. But “within” there is no “fear”, and there is also no “ego”. The simple fact that I know that is enough to separate myself from the “ego” and remain within. Quieting my mind.

I went out today for a power walk. Looking at me, you would never call it that. But, for me, the effort is great to actually do it. I was trapped in a mental illness for more than 4 years, that kept me confined to my home like a prisoner. I did not need locks on the door to keep me in, my mind was doing that quite well. The simple joy of taking a walk outside, something we all take for granted, was to me, today, the greatest blessing I could receive. When I was done walking I just stood and watched, practicing not labeling my vision. What peace, what joy….and to think, it was just a simple walk.

OK, IT'S TIME TO TAKE A WALK!

Image via WikipediaFor the last 10 or so days, I have been fortunate to be introduced to Autism and Aspergers, and the amazing Moms and Dads that raise children that have this disorder. The umbrella of Autism is so expansive that I doubt that "I" will ever know all of the signs or symptoms, but these parents are so informed and pro-active, it is a joy to see. I have gone to different blogs and been introduced to these amazing people and their children, I have seen movies, photos, art work and parents sharing, either through video or on paper, what it is like for them to live under this umbrella. I was hesitant there and the word "cloud" came to mind, but that is not what I saw. I saw parents that realize the blessing of these children, see their beauty, and thank God everyday to have them. I don't see the regrets or frustration, although I'm sure there is a lot, but what they share is the joys, and I believe they do it for other parents without even realizing that is what they are doing. They certainly do it with no thought of reciprocity, and that alone, is an accolade to each of them.

I have not experienced what they live everyday, but I know it takes very special people to do this, and I know that God had a hand in that for sure. I hope they all feel that way, although I'm sure, like all parents, they have the days where they wonder where God really is. I have seen God's work in these 2 weeks and it is a miraculous and beautiful thing, and I just want to applaud each of these parents for their love, fortitude, and the courage to put themselves out there for others, it takes special people to do that.

I hope if you have not seen the efforts that are being put forth to change the legislature around this disease, that you will educate yourself more and let your congressman know what changes you want implemented. This is a more than worthy cause, but even just to meet these amazing people, you should take a trip through the blogs of these people that are blogging for Autism this month. You should start with Momologue

Take five and dive right in, see what it is all about and offer support where you can.